Even if Today, I Know that Tomorrow…
Even if today, it seems everyone and everything has failed us
Turned their backs on us
My surroundings are grey and cold
Everything is heavy
My body is numb
From over drive mode
My Heart is gutted
After that heavenly break was taken from underneath me
Mind is stuck in that zone
After negativity robbed it
And filled it with dread
With fear of the future
Suspicion of everyone’s intentions
The block I built towards trust
Shattered to pieces that
Will take more work, more time
I know that tomorrow,
Maybe the day after tomorrow
I’ll regain that strength, that power
To look future in the eyes
With conviction that you’ll live independently
Look fear at its peak
And weaken it with my
My love for you my son
That one element in my bone
That even if,
After being broken down
Will replenish itself
To reunite me with my unbreakable passion
To pull my will power from the root
And trust both will lead me
To unbelievable heights
To provide you with promise, tangible possibilities
And a fulfilling future
Even if today it seems that autism beat us,
I know that tomorrow life will uplift us again
I packed some healthy pb&j and ham sandwiches with grapes, multi-grain crackers, string cheese, carrots, and blue tortilla chips for our picnic. It was a perfect sunny day in northern cali today. Boys played in the playground then we had our adventurous bike ride. The trail had a few fun hills. I was nervous about my Andrew going too fast or crashing into the opposite traffic. He was so fast and ready to get training wheels off soon. It’s such a regulating activity for him.
February 10, 2015 Image
I’m an Autism Mom. Hear me ROAR!!
I’m gonna be down right honest. I am sad and my heart feels so heavy since last night after reading this article on autistic kids’ futures. What struck me most is reading other parents’ comments on how worried they are about their child’s future after they’re gone. This same exact worry along with fear of middle and high school days terrify me to no end! Today was my son’s last speech therapy with a wonderful therapist he’s had for 6 years. I’m feeling overwhelmed trying to find group social skills group and looking for another regulating activity for him as well. Plus I have work, party planning and ambitious valentine projects (which I enjoy because it’s a hobby) to complete in the next day or two. My husband lost his job and will work again in two weeks. My father in law’s cancer is slowly crawling back and fearful of the responsibility of aging sick parents. I’m on overload again after a long break and it sucks!!!!!!!!!
With the last heavy posts, I decided to lighten things up a little. I update this page (Some Art in Our Lives) under Menu.
One of my favorite hobbies is to semi-make artsy craftsy stuff for my boys’ parties. Birthdays and school holidays are the only times I really make time to get into it. Our tradition is I buy boys matching themed shirts and deco out depending on the boy’s choice of theme for the year. I’ve been obsessed with fondant decorative cakes since the 1st Bday Party up to now. Party planning, as you Mom’s know is stressful but I do really enjoy the making part. Since I’m not one to make things from scratch, much credit to Pinterest and other sites for the ideas! Comment below if you want specifics on how I made certain things.
Andrew’s 1st Bday Party: Jungle Forest Theme
Anthony’s 2nd Bday Party: Froggie Theme
Anthony’s 3rd Bday Party: Train Theme
Andrew’s 4th Bday Party: Thomas The Train!
Andrew’s 7th Bday Party: Minions!!
Anthony’s 5th Bday Party: Disney’s Where’s My Water?
Andrew’s 8th Bday Party: M&M’s Lunch & Arcade