Even if Today, I Know that Tomorrow…

Even if Today, I Know that Tomorrow…

Even if today, it seems everyone and everything has failed us

Turned their backs on us
My surroundings are grey and cold

Everything is heavy

My body is numb

From over drive mode

My Heart is gutted

After that heavenly break was taken from underneath me

Mind is stuck in that zone

After negativity robbed it

And filled it with dread

With fear of the future

Suspicion of everyone’s intentions

The block I built towards trust

Shattered to pieces that

Will take more work, more time

To reconcile

I know that tomorrow,

Maybe the day after tomorrow

I’ll regain that strength, that power

To look future in the eyes

With conviction that you’ll live independently

Look fear at its peak

And weaken it with my

Perseverance

My love for you my son

That one element in my bone

That even if,

After being broken down

Will replenish itself

To reunite me with my unbreakable passion

To pull my will power from the root

And trust both will lead me

To unbelievable heights

To provide you with promise, tangible possibilities

And a fulfilling future

Even if today it seems that autism beat us,

I know that tomorrow life will uplift us again

Some Art in Our Lives

With the last heavy posts, I decided to lighten things up a little.  I update this page (Some Art in Our Lives) under Menu.

One of my favorite hobbies is to semi-make artsy craftsy stuff for my boys’ parties. ¬†Birthdays and school holidays are the only times I really make time to get into it. ¬†Our tradition is I buy boys matching themed shirts and deco out depending on the boy’s choice of theme for the year. ¬†I’ve been obsessed with fondant decorative cakes since the 1st Bday Party up to now. ¬†Party planning, as you Mom’s know is stressful but I do really enjoy the making part. ¬†Since I’m not one to make things from scratch, much credit to Pinterest and other sites for the ideas! ¬†Comment below if you want specifics on how I made certain things.

Andrew’s 1st¬†Bday Party: Jungle Forest¬†Theme

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Anthony’s 2nd Bday Party: Froggie Theme

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Anthony’s 3rd Bday Party: Train¬†Theme

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Andrew’s 4th¬†Bday Party: Thomas The Train!

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Andrew’s 7th¬†Bday Party: Minions!!

2013-10-26_1233 2013-10-26_1237_06 2013-10-26_1638_02  minionshirt minionshirt1  .2013-10-26_1717

Anthony’s 5th Bday Party: Disney’s¬†Where’s My Water?

2014-03-29_183925 dtmw dtmw2 dtmw3¬† Anthony’s had his name on front and age 5 on the back.

Andrew’s 8th Bday Party:¬†M&M’s Lunch & ¬†Arcade

2014-10-25_123526      2014-10-25_123521        2014-10-25_123456   Bought brown banners and added round multi color stock paper and white letters.  

2015-02-14 2015 Valentines for Class

2015 WP22013 4th of July/Dad’s Bday. ¬†Yes I screwed up on the USA flag colors. ¬†Ooops.

2013 Valentines

2013 VAlentines

Generalizing his coping skills

Late post from 7/26/14

kayak

This looks like an ordinary pic of a 7 year old. In my eyes and to those who know Andrew¬†well, seeing him sitting calmly and knowing this kayak ride was free of anxiety and high energy is huge! ¬†This Lil guy had a rough week: a traumatizing hospital procedure and a dreadful 2 hour speech therapy eval. ¬†Through them he utilized the skills he’s been equipped with, to the best of his ability. ¬†Before the dental procedure held at a hospital, he didn’t need assistance walking from pre-op to the the surgery room. ¬†He did freeze in the hall where way too many staff nurses were staring at him. ¬†Andrew crouched while clutching on his blankie, started crying and said, “There’s too many people here!!” ¬†That’s huge! ¬†He was a big boy and finally walked into the OR. ¬†When the RNs finally had to carry him on to the table, he cried and said “Mommy I don’t want to go to sleep!” ¬†It was really hard and emotional for me to watch that followed by the doctor applying the mask to his face. ¬†I could hear him struggle and try to talk but he passed out.

During an annual speech evaluation, Andrew was pretty tired. ¬†I made the mistake of scheduling it the same week as his procedure. ¬†He did well overall but made a few comments like this is too long or I’m done but he kept going answering questions and working.

As his mom, who’s traveled down this road with him for 7 years, I am so proud of how much he has progressed and how hard he tries everyday to do all the things that come naturally to 7 years olds, but have to be taught to him.

Patience, patience and more patience

Today was a day of never-ending tantrums and frustration for Andrew. One of the many “minor” set offs included Anthony (younger brother)¬†ripping the spoiler off this Indy car. No where to be found.¬† Andrew¬†listened to music to calm down & later made this paper spoiler. Although he cried & screamed, he managed to resolve it independently. One of our day to day goals is to learn how to regulate the overwhelming emotions that’s 50x worse for asd kids. We’re slowly getting there. ‚Ä™#‚Äéautismisexhausting‚Ĩ ‚Ä™#‚Äéneedtobestrong ‚Ĩ‚Ä™#‚Äépatiencepatience‚Ĩ&morepatienceindy